Smoking Keeps You Calm?
I've worked with a lot of people to quit smoking. In doing this, I have heard all kinds of reasons that it might be better if they kept smoking.
I've been told smoking sharpens your mind, relaxes you, calms you, keeps you from yelling at the kids (or spouse), tastes good with coffee, tastes better after a meal. In short, makes you feel "better". (I always ask "better than what"?)
I know you don't really believe these reasons, or why would you be trying to stop smoking. Still, a part of you DOES believe these reasons.
You do have a strong reason to keep smoking or you would have quit by now. Just so you know, there are not any laws stating your reason to keep smoking needs to make any sense. It rarely does.
In fact, 99% of the reasons you continue can easily be proven incorrect. Maybe smoking keeps you from blowing up and yelling at your spouse because you're mouth is full of smoke, or even better, you have to go outside to smoke.
Most of the time you KNOW the reason doesn't make sense. That doesn't change the craving though, does it? Just one more one more reason in your list of reasons to quit. A list that doesn't have much chance against the well-rooted cravings to smoke.
It's basically about two things. The motivation that smoking will make you feel better and the feeling that you're trying to feel better than. That is all.
If you're thirsty you crave something to drink. If you're hungry you crave food. If you feel bad (tired, stressed, overwhelmed, angry, lonely, whatever...) you want to feel good. And, whatever your mind has been taught feels good, you will crave.
This is an only slightly simplified explanation of a craving. Most smokers have more than one type of craving like, the 'first thing in the morning' craving feels different than the 'after lunch' craving. But the same model applies.
So how to help this situation? I can spend a few articles explaining it (and I have, look for them) But, it comes down to changing the feelings, motivations and beliefs involved.
First, the 'bad feeling' side of things needs to be addressed. If it's too much stress, get it managed, if it's a situation that makes you lonely, do what you can to fix it, or look for help.
Second, the belief that smoking makes you feel good (it is often the mistaken, and understandable, belief that smoking equals being an adult, in control, strong, capable, etc...) The fact is, smoking is some plant leaf and chemicals wrapped in paper. The good feeling you're looking for, and sometimes experience, is created by YOU. YOU make yourself feel better when you smoke. You can make yourself feel just as good when drinking a glass of water. If, your mind believes it.
And that's the trick. Quit smoking is mainly about modifying behavior. That's why the success rate of medication and nicotine replacement alone is so poor. The only current exception is Chantix and even Pfizer, the makers of Chantix, recommend behavior modification along with the medication.
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